CERN

[Markus]

Hey folks,

have you heard about the slightly scary news from CERN?

The particle accelerator went online these days, so to say. Critics have been warning that tiny black holes might form when the accelerator works at full energy. "Tiny" doesn't sound so dangerous, but once there is a black hole it starts sucking up matter and growing. So once free, the thing would eat its way to the core of the Earth and then swallow the planet from within.

Scientists said there was no real danger, as high-energy particle collisions happen naturally when cosmic rays hit our atmosphere. So if black holes could form due to such collisions, it would have happened long ago and we wouldn't be here anymore. So far the theory, but now a German science portal reported that things look different now... They have found an ultra-compact unknown particle. It might be one of the Higgs-bosons they are searching for (hypothetical particles that would explain why matter has mass), but some of its parameters don't quite fit the theories. Right now there is a hectic analysis going on, but there is an estimated 2% probability that in fact it is one of the miniature black holes that were disregarded as mere products of paranoia.

Well, most likely it is not a black hole. Even if it is, it's not immediately dangerous as they have trapped the particle in strong magnetic fields. According to theory, a black hole this size should "evaporate" within the next few days due to Hawking-radiation. If it doesn't, however, they must find a way to dispose of a black hole. Looks like a great chance to gather lots of new information, but in a way it's scary, too.

I'll keep you updated!

Cheers!

Markus

[Persephone]

Yes My friends on facebook had statuses like: Gosh people, come partying! We are all gonna die tomorrow in a black hole

I think once was already in CERN a small black hole? But I am not afraid. I am enjoying it. Black holes and studying them, reading the literature about them is for me better experience than sex 

[Markus]

Hey Miri,

surely not tomorrow. Even if a miniature black holes escapes CERN and starts growing, it would likely take decades before it reaches a considerable size.

But no, there has never been evidence of a black hole on earth before, and even this time it's rather unlikely. Luckily, I must add, because how do you dispose of a black hole?

Cheers!

Markus

[Luth]

Guys, I suppose you already know the new particle accelerator is placed just in Catalonia... exactly very NEAR Barcelona... I never thought I'd say that, but I'm really scared now! News say that tiny black holes, like the ones Markus mentioned, are appearing randomly in my vicinity. They're supposed to disappear as fast as they have appeared, but... what if they don't, and they grow? I'm not sure it's even safe for Markus to come here in 2 weeks! I imagine scientifics know what to do, but about black holes, I prefer not to be sure of anything.

I'll keep you informed about the news!  

[Markus]

Dear Luth,

that is surely an unexpected result and big challenge to the existing physical theories! But if CERN showed the same effect that does cerntainly explain why I keep searching for my keys...

Cheers!

Markus

[Luth]

No, no, no... they are little tiny black holes, not your keys, what it's appearing here... If I hear about your keys, I'll let you know! 

[Markus]

That's very kind of you, thanks!

I was just wondering if perhaps CERN could create miniature black holes that swallow my keys - or more often my pens - before they dissolve in a flash of light and a bit of nothingness.

Cheers!

Markus

[Luth]

No keys nor pens... my socks!! But only one of each pair just after the washing machine!  

[saphira]

Hey! I haven't heard anything about it at all..   

Ok, I would really like to know how many of this tiny black holes there are? How are the chances that they don't go away on their own and what if we can't make them go away? What if it's something else? And if it is, what is it? 


And also, can someone please explain what CERN stands for?  European Organization for Nuclear research, right?

Thanks

[Markus]

Dear Saphi,

you haven't heard of it in the real news because it was just a part of my NTSMS April Fool's joke.

But you're right, CERN stands for "European Organisation for Nuclear Research", but originally it was called "Conseil Européen pour la Recherche Nucléaire" - hence the acronym.

Cheers!

Markus

[saphira]

Dear Saphi,

you haven't heard of it in the real news because it was just a part of my NTSMS April Fool's joke.

 
Oh dear..upsiee..    hehehe, you really got me.. I thought this was weird.. but it was so weird that it was interesting to bite in and ask what's it about.. 

[Lucy]

Hope you are satisfied, Markus.

[Markus]

Yes indeed, Lucy.

Actually this one was only intended to be a distraction from my actual joke, but I'm glad that it worked by itself.

Next year will be very, very tough, though...

Cheers!

Markus

[Lucy]

You can only hope that we will be polite enough and let you play.

[Markus]

We will see if that is my only hope, Lucy.  

[Luth]

My only "word":

 

[Persephone]

Just found this topic.

Got a friend who works there. Just FYI.

[Markus]

Wow - must be quite inspiring to work at a place like that, at the foremost frontier of natural science.

[Luth]

Yay!! I think there's only one CERN, the one near Barcelona, am I wrong? I'll say hello to her/him if I see your friend 

Yup, that must be incredible to work in a place like that...Your friend is very lucky!! 

[Markus]

Kris, what exactly does your friend do there? They must have a gazillion of different jobs...